I was sitting here minding my own business, perusing the web, looking for topics that we could use for our radio show tomorrow morning and I stopped on this bird.
I giggled. In fact, I laughed outright. While I don't have any chickens currently, it is a topic that has been discussed. In addition, while I don't have any chickens of my own to smooch, I could totally see myself doing that. Yup. I would be a Chicken Kisser.
That's gross, right?
It is. I have this discussion all the time with non-cat-kissers (aka- my mother), too. I tell her all the time that the reason her feline is so unruly is because she needs to kiss her more. Her cat wants to be kissed. Clearly.
By more, I mean: Start kissing your cat. My mother is simply not a Cat-Kisser. I've tried to explain to her that it's what us Cat Moms must do. If you think that's nasty (and I get why you would because the germaphobe in me agrees), I bet it's because you don't have any furbabies of your own to smooch. You just kinda look past all those germs that could be creeping around.
However, I like to think I have some animal smooching standards. I never do mouth-to-mouth puckers. That would be a bit much, even for me. Yet, I'm all about a nose-to-nose nuzzle or a smooch on the top of their heads. Hannah Baby and Mr. Fuzzybottoms love those.
Okay, if we're really gonna be honest, I've also been known to smooch this belly quite a few times. Look at him. Wouldn't you?!?!
I broached this chicken subject with my fiancé about our future house plans. My wants were pretty easy.
1. I need a bathtub.
2. I need a big kitchen.
3. I'd like to have a huge garden.
4. And maybe we could have a chicken. Actually two. I wouldn't want the one to get lonely.
He was all about my first three requirements, but he drew the line on livestock. He said something about neighborhood codes and regulations (and then I stopped listening...)
Besides the whole fact that I don't really even eat eggs anymore, I thought I'd be doing us a favor.
1. We'd save money on groceries.
2. He would have organic eggs to eat fresh from the yard.
3. I could save 2 chickens from being factory farmed (and they could live out their years in the luxury of our backyard).
4. I could pick out some cute chicken names.
5. I found a pink chicken leash. So I pretty much would have to take our chickens for a walk. Yes, in that same neighborhood with all those stuffy rules and regulations. I'd be that person.
I showed him the leash.
So I get it. I get loving your animals and I get kissing your chickens. I would, too. But for your health, you may want to start blowing kisses to your pet birds and cutting down on the snuggles.
If had a leash, though, I would never cut down on their walks around the block. Just get out there and shake your tail feathers and don't give two clucks what those neighbors think.